Bound by Fire
by TheSoundOfBluebells
Summary: In an older age, Bella must marry a man she doesn't know or trust. She was tramatized as a child, making it hard for her to accept love. Will something unexpected blossom between two lost souls? And can they face the trials yet to come? BxE
1. First Night

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do, however, own a pink laptop.**

**Chapter One**

I stared at the small diamond ring in my finger, slowly twisting it back and forth. Until today, I had believed that trying to choke back my pride and despair while being married to a wealthy stranger I'd never even met before was possibly the hardest thing I had ever done. Now I knew better, because I was about to do something even more frightening- my wedding night.

When I was younger, I had entertained foolish fantasies about growing up, falling in love, and marrying, in that order. I never thought about the before or after, only how much I wanted it. When I was older, I'd tried to put aside such impossible dreams and become the lady I was supposed to be- Lady Isabella Swan, daughter of a prominent and wealthy lord. Despite this, I had still nurtured hope deep within my heart that one day, I would meet the perfect man- that is, until the morning I learned of my betrothal to a stranger, the only young lord considered good enough for me. Of course I was devastated, but what could I do? I was going to be married whether I liked it or not. It was just a matter of how much I would humiliate myself if I fought or searched for another way.

And now, here I was, literally hiding from my husband on our wedding night in the small sitting room that was connected to his-no, _ours_ now-bedchamber. Because I was alone. Because I was desperate and scared. I knew I was expected to produce an heir. I knew I was expected to give my husband whatever he wanted. And because of this obligation, and because he was so much stronger than me physically, I didn't have a choice. But I didn't love him! I wanted a happy ending so badly, but I wasn't going to get one. People had arranged marriages in the upper classes all the time. I should have expected this to happen; however, usually the betrothed couple at least met before they wed! I had never even set eyes on the young lord until we were taking vows, and now we were here-and I was still being a coward, hiding from the inevitable.

Gathering up the edges of my beautiful dress, I slowly walked towards the door, knowing that each step brought me closer to a man I never wanted. A man who I didn't even know.

***

I opened the door, moving as sluggishly as I could. I was being silly, trying to postpone something that I was obsessing over in my lack of knowledge, because I didn't know _how_ to do what was required of me- I'd never even kissed a man before, because of my parents and their hugely overprotective and formal ways.

"Have you finished removing the pins?" a soft voice inquired, curiously mild. My face flushed, for I had lied and said I needed a moment to remove my hairpins as an excuse to leave the room. When I looked up, my eyes connected with those of Lord Edward Masen, the only son of the late Lord Anthony. His were a deep emerald, startlingly vibrant in contrast with his dark unruly hair. In reality, he was extremely handsome, and only a few years older than me. While I was seventeen, he was around the age of twenty-three or so. I was very lucky- in everyone's eyes but my own.

Suddenly I realized I was just standing there, staring at him while he sat upright in the bed we were preparing to share.

"Yes, thank you. I will…join you shortly," I answered, though my voice had faded to a whisper before I finished. I thought I saw him sigh, eyes downcast for a moment, but I had to have imagined it. The next moment he replied, voice still calm and steady. "Very well."

Making my way over to the far side of the room near the edge of the bed, I was suddenly struck by how large the bed was. It could several people if it had to, and its pattern of black, blue, and white was rather pretty. It was then I knew I must truly be going mad. I never cared about insignificant little things like _beds_. Touching the edge of the decorative coverlet, I almost had to stifle a giggle. Poor Lord Edward, stuck with a mad wife.

As soon as I thought the word _wife_,reality suddenly filtered back, leaving me with a sudden unreasonable terror, which probably only proved my madness, but was making my hands shake and my blood race. I was acutely aware that Edward was staring at me, and that fists were now tightly clenching the coverlet. "I-I need h-help," I said shakily, gesturing to the back of dress I wore. I was regretting my mother's decision to choose a dress I could not take off without assistance. Now, I realized, it had most likely been her motive all along, to give me-or him- a way to get close to begin our wedding night with less tension for us. I was probably the more stressed of us two, though, because I was panicking, and he seemed calm and was most likely more experienced than I.

Across from me, he frowned, and I was struck with horror by the thought that I was a nuisance already. I was going to apologize, and had just opened my mouth to speak when he stopped me.

"Of course. Here, turn around."

Immediately I obeyed, putting my back to him while he pulled himself across the bed to where I still stood by the edge. I noticed he was wearing only his undergarments, but before this could fully register, I felt cool fingers at the back of my neck. I stiffened, and they moved downward, easily undoing the ties. My pulse picked up speed, and suddenly moisture was spilling down my face as Edward grasped my shoulders and spun me around.

"Isabella? Lady Isabella, what's wrong?" he asked in a low, urgent voice. I should have been elated that he was concerned, that he was good enough to care that I was crying, but I could feel nothing but my own fear as my dress slipped off, forming a little puddle of expensive cloth. I was left in only my corset and very little in the way of undergarments. When I didn't respond, Edward pulled me onto the bed, his hands still on me as he spoke.

"Isabella, tell me! Why are you upset?" he cried out, frustration and confusion sweeping across his features.

My mouth began to move of my own accord, out of my control. "Please, no, no, I don't want to!" I sobbed brokenly, my overwhelming emotions out of control as I completely fell apart, losing my last remaining vestiges of self-control. My body refused my commands, stubbornly defying me while I despaired. My voice grew increasingly desperate. "Please, don't make me-"

"Isabella, calm down." His voice was strained as he cut me off. "You don't want me to make you do what?" he asked, still trying in vain to console me.

"Tonight, we h-have to, and a heir, and I-I can't, and you, and-"

This time, I managed to stop myself. I tried to turn away to hide the tears that were flowing down my cheeks, but his hand was gripping my arm and I couldn't move. I was bleary eyed, but I could still see the distinct emotions that flitted across my new husband's face. Confusion, then understanding and shock. When I saw the anger and horror settle across his strong features, I braced myself, flinching away. My own mother had told me this could happen. That the young lord would only care about what I was to give him as a wife, and that he could be rough and would hurt me if I didn't obey. Because I was I a girl. I was nearly a servant to my husband, because I had to do whatever he required of me. And seeing the look on Lord Edward's face made me prepare me for the worst.

When his hand tightened almost imperceptibly on me, I tensed, afraid of his reaction to my fear. I wasn't anticipating anything good, and I was trying unsuccessfully to curl up, away from him.

"Look at me," he commanded. Slowly I raised my eyes to his verdant ones, almost gasping for breath. "Do you think I'm going to hurt you? Or did you not wish to marry me, because this was arranged? Because I'm not going to harm you, and I'm guessing this marriage was in your control about as much as it was in mine." His voice was still hard, and I could tell he was upset. His attempts at helping me gain my composure were a failure, because I couldn't trust him. I didn't know him, and he still expected me to do this tonight, all the while claiming he wouldn't hurt me, even as he held me in place by force.

So I sat in silence, having no answer for this man who was leaning over me, acting as though I should believe him. As his face grew expressionless and distant, his frustration was still apparent, though he tried to disguise it. "Why won't you listen?" he groaned, more to himself than me.

"Because," I choked out, fresh tears streaking from my eyes, "you're going to use me, no matter what you say. You're lying to me. You said you wouldn't hurt me, but you are!"

There was a long silence where the only sound was my now reduced sniffling, and I watched as Edward's eyes widened, shock flooding his face for a second time, followed by disgust. It made it all worse, that he was disgusted by me. Disgusted and probably repulsed, too.

"Is that what you think, Isabella?" he asked softly, his features now unreadable.

Instead of answering, I tried to jerk away, attempting to wrench myself free of his vise-like grip. Suddenly he let go, dropping my arm as if it had burned him like a hot coal. He leaned away, eyes dark. "We won't do anything tonight, Isabella," he whispered, while reaching for me again. I shied away, until he had a hold of my corset. Numb, I allowed him to unlace and remove it, so that very little of me was covered. He tossed the hated thing from the bed and kept his eyes averted from me. I waited for him to do something, like remove the rest of my clothing, but he instead pulled the covers back and draped them over me. I was still just staring blankly, utterly spent. Turning his back to me, Lord Edward Masen slid under the sheets on the opposite side of the bed, as far away from me as he could get. When he blew out the candle, I could only see his vague silhouette. Panic gripped me again for a moment, before I saw his shadowy form lay down, still facing away from me.

I sat there for a long time. As drained an exhausted as my awful night had left me, I still didn't want to sleep. It was as if laying down and being in the same bed as the man I was married to, even if we hadn't…done anything, would make it feel real. Final and irrevocable.

My silent vigil ended when I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer. The kind of darkness that only exhaustion can induce claimed me, and I sank willingly into the depths of unconsciousness.

* * *

**Note: Because this story is set in a different time period, and is combined with both realistic and made-up aspects, I will post a brief summary at the end of each chapter.**

**Bella has a terrible family secret. Also, she is very afraid of men and what they expect from her because of what relationships she watched growing up; she believes that most men are heartless and unknown, even though she fantasized about meeting the perfect man who portrayed better charateristics. **

**Thank you for reading this chapter. Please review so I will know whether or not I should continue to add to the story. I've already written several more chapters and this story in Edward's POV. If you have any questions please feel free to ask. **


	2. Dawn of Trust

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do, however, own way too many dogs.**

**Chapter Two**

Drifting in haze of comfort, I slowly regained conscious. Instead of opening my eyes, I smiled without thinking and burrowed deeper into the sweet smelling pillows. It was peaceful and quiet, with the sun shining from the window. Something, like a forgotten dream trying to be remembered, struggled to break into my thoughts. The previous day flooded back into my awareness all at once.

I gasped and sat up so fast it made my head spin. I scanned the room, and to my immense relief, it was empty. Edward's side of the bed was empty, with a large indentation where he had slept. What was I going to say? It was humiliating, to say the least, that I had fallen to pieces like that. Now, in broad daylight, I was fine. But still, the thought of tonight sent chills down my spine. I shuddered, wondering just how angry Edward might be.

I contemplated that. Maybe he wasn't that angry- he _had_ just let me sleep last night. But then the image of his face, and the way he'd grabbed me crossed my mind again. There was no way I could forget that.

Even as I thought this over, the door swung open. I pulled the covers back over myself, feeling self-conscious. Somehow, being surrounded by the blanket gave me an odd sense of security. I traced the shadows cast along the wall with my eyes so I wouldn't have to look at Edward. I suddenly realized I'd subconsciously stopped thinking of him as Lord Edward or just 'my husband' as I had taken to calling him in my mind. Before I could think about that, he sat down on the bed across from where I was curled up. While I was still wearing what I slept in, Edward had on fresh clothes, which meant he'd been up a lot longer than me.

He opened his mouth to speak, but I cut him off. I needed him to understand that my hysteria hadn't been intentional and wouldn't happen again. "I'm sorry. You must be so angry." I began, still unable to meet his eyes.

"Sorry? Isabella, I understand you weren't prepared for this. I'm going to give you the time and space to adjust. You're too young to be married."

I gaped openly at him, unprepared for this reaction to my words. He was still speaking, eyes intent upon my face as though he could make me listen to him by the sheer strength of his gaze.

"And I'm not angry," he continued. "I'm _furious_-just not at you."

Who was he furious at then? My parents, perhaps, for giving him a useless bride?

"You did nothing wrong but be born to the wrong family. And I hurt you." At this last statement, my breathing became very shallow. Edward watched me carefully, like I was a wild animal about to bolt.

Slowly, he leaned forward and extended his hand. I stared at it, uncomprehending.

"Can I see your arm? I want to see what I did to you. I want you to know I really didn't mean to hurt you."

At this admission, I put my arm out to him, trying not to betray the fact that I was shaking-whether from relief or surprise, I didn't know. He hadn't meant to hurt me. He was going to give me space. He was _worried_ about me, as if he really cared. And maybe he did. Maybe I would be lucky enough to have a good man for a husband. That was better than having an abusive one, and would ease the stinging disappointment that had followed the realization that I wouldn't have my fairy tale love.

Edward's cool fingers wrapped around my wrist, jolting me from my reverie. I watched as he carefully inspected the skin from my wrist to my elbow. His face hardened, and he inhaled sharply as I noticed what he saw. Small purplish bruises ringed my skin where he had held it last night. His frown deepened as he touched them and I flinched, surprised by the sudden pain. How strong was he, to have _bruised_ me while only holding me in place? I was nearly as shocked as he was, but for once I handled it better than him. "They'll go away soon, I guess." I mumbled, trying to downplay it.

"They shouldn't be here in the first place!" he snapped. I remained silent, because I had no reply to that. He was visibly upset. The hand that held my wrist slackened, and I pulled it free. He still hadn't added anything else when he got up and strode from the room. He vanished from view then reappeared, this time holding a tray.

"Here. I'm guessing you're still tired and don't want to get up yet." He handed me the tray, which I saw held an assortment of warm bread, jelly, and fruit. I accepted it gratefully. His guess was right on the mark; I didn't want to get up yet, but I still wanted to eat something.

There was an awkward pause, because I wasn't sure if he wanted any, and he made no move to leave the room. After a moment he turned away and dragged a chair out from under the huge mahogany desk in one corner of the room. He took his place and began ruffling through some papers without even looking at me. I waited for another minute, and then began to eagerly eat as much as I could; I hadn't eaten at all the day before due to nerves, and it was obviously already late in the morning because I'd overslept.

My full belly combined with a body that had endured too much mental and emotional stress in the space of a few painful days was enough to knock me out as soon as I'd finished. I no longer cared that he was still in the room; he was trying to help me, and I was too tired to care anyway. I dropped away to the sound of a pen scratching against paper and soft breathing.

***

The day had gone by fast, spent sleeping or eating. Edward was gone when I woke up. There was fresh food on a table beside the bed, and I ate with as much hunger as before. I wondered where he was, but I had no inclination to search for him. I was just fine here, where I could try to come to terms with my new life in undisturbed peace.

By the time Edward returned, it was already dark outside once more. He knocked before he entered so I would know he was coming in.

"I'm just getting my nightclothes. I've got some here for you, too," he informed me, handing me a pale white nightdress. "I'll go into the other room to change, while you get that on," he offered without hesitation. I nodded, somewhat relieved to finally have something substantial to wear. I also appreciated the fact that he was granting me privacy to put the silky little dress on.

Edward left the room with his retrieved clothing in one hand. I changed as fast as I could, and it didn't take very long to don my nightclothes. A few minutes passed before Edward reentered our bedchamber, shirtless with long dark pants on. It was like déjà vu; he walked over and sat on his side of the bed before turning in my direction. A small grin crossed his features. He was obviously in better spirits than he had been this morning.

"Isabella, I must tell you, everyone is going to think we spent the whole of last night and today…together. I never left this wing of the house except to get food, and no one has seen us, so I believe it's safe to assume that rumors are spreading. And you know, I'm not really that inclined to do anything to stop it." His smile spread further. "But you'll be happy about that, won't you?" he asked.

I blushed, thinking of what others would be saying…and how that gossip would spread to my parents. They would believe I had fulfilled my duty, and that my husband was pleased with me. This was, in retrospect, perfect. From Edward's expression, he was just as delighted with this turn of events as I was, though I couldn't fathom why. He shouldn't be happy with this, shouldn't even be mildly accepting. And yet, he was.

But even as I watched, the look in his eyes dimmed, and he removed himself from the bed. "Where are you going?" I asked, the revelation that I wasn't going to suffer from neither my parent's nor Edward's wrath emboldening me. I could handle this now, couldn't I? Everything was slowly balancing out, becoming less awful. If I was honest with myself, it was mostly because of Edward.

"I'm going back into the sitting room. I'm sleeping in there. I only came back into here to make sure you didn't worry yourself sick over what your parents find out," he informed me, his green flashing with disdain.

It was all too much; the man standing in front of me was protecting me, from my own parents. He was trying not to hurt me, and he had taken care of me today. And now, he was giving me his own bed and leaving to sleep on a couch to give me space. I didn't have love, but I had been given something nearly as good. And I was letting that good thing walk away.

I was out of the bed with my arms around Edward's waist before he'd even taken two steps. He looked down at me in bewilderment as I sobbed into his chest. I had gone from seeming absolutely terrified of him to practically clinging to him in a matter of seconds, so I understood his confusion. He couldn't understand what this meant to me; nobody could. He hesitated before wrapping his strong arms around me, holding me to him like a child. "Please don't go. I don't want you to sleep in there. I want you to stay," I tried to say, but my voice was thick with tears and muffled by his chest. I could barely breathe, I was so choked up.

Apparently, he got the gist of what I was saying despite my incoherency, because he bent down and picked me up. Hugged tightly to his body, I was carried back to the bed and gently set back down.

"It's okay, it's fine," he whispered to me. "I'm staying. I only thought you'd be more comfortable if I slept in another room."

We rocked back and forth on the edge of the bed for a long time. He didn't say anything as I emptied myself of my seemingly endless supply of tears. I cried out all the fear I'd felt, all the overwhelming emotions I'd felt and fought for the past two days. He held me through all of it, even though he didn't really know me- or the real reasons for my tears.

At some point, I must've fallen asleep, because I felt him tug at my arms, still locked around his waist, and then blackness.

***

My eyes flickered open, and I realized I didn't even remember closing them. Images of last night-being held by Edward, my surge of emotion, nearly begging him to stay- flashed through my brain as I blinked, disoriented. I started to shift and discovered I couldn't because I was tangled up with Edward. I was mortified by own behavior. What had I done?

For all I knew, he thought I was insane. Most likely he was disgusted; I had cried like a little child, and I was displaying no control over myself, unlike his usually calm demeanor. Feeling pathetic and useless, I tried to slip through his arms again. This time, his hold on me loosened. I peeked up to see his open eyes settle on me. I gasped and pulled away. I thought about how completely appalled he had be, waking up to find me wrapped up with him when I'd made it a point to avoid physical contact.

"Isabella?" he asked. That one word was full of questions. But how to answer them? I couldn't tell him the truth about my family; that was never, ever going to happen. I was also terribly reluctant to show him just how wrecked I was by admitting how I felt: safe, because he was protecting me from my own kin. Guilty, because I was making life harder for him. Pained, because I was trapped. Fury, at myself because I couldn't control my wildly oscillating emotions around him.

For a moment I could have sworn I saw hurt flash across his face, but then it settled back into a calm, nearly expressionless mask tinted with confusion. I saw no disgust or resentment, so I settled for replying in what was probably the calmest voice he'd heard me use yet. "Yes?" I was purposely avoiding a direct response to what he wanted to know. I acted oblivious, pretending to not understand.

His eyes narrowed in irritation. I looked deliberately looked away, not wanting my face to betray me.

"Don't act as if you don't know what I mean; you're hiding something other than your fear of being with me, I can tell. But if you're not going to tell me what it is, I'll just keep upsetting you. Like last night. Are you at least going to explain _that_?"

He watched me with an intensity that proved he was serious; he knew, somehow, that something was wrong, and wanted an explanation for my dramatics as well. I shifted uneasily, acutely aware that I was still in close proximity with him.

I owed him a small explanation, at least. I wasn't giving up all my secrets-not even a fraction-but I resolved to tell him what I could. I sat up a little straighter, trying to exude confidence. "I don't know what you're talking about." I stated stiffly. "As for last night…I really, _really_ don't want to discuss it."

I turned pleading eyes upward, seeking his face. He chose to ignore my look. Instead, he sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.

"I can see that," he said dryly. "But it doesn't change a thing."

I wanted to glare at him, but I didn't have the nerve. He frustrated me, but I was so intimidated by him, I dared not act on it. As if sensing this, Edward changed tactics.

"If I was merely your friend, and not the husband that you hate, would you have told me when I asked?" he wanted to know.

My shock at his chosen words was enough to shatter the flimsy wall of defense I'd built around myself. "What? What do you mean? I don't hate you!" I sputtered, completely taken by surprise.

"But you're scared of me," he pointed out. "How else do you mean to explain your actions?" he said without pause. I would have laughed at his attempts to trick me into revealing information, if I hadn't been so stunned by his directness. "I'm not anymore." I began, taking a deep breath. "If I was still unwilling to trust you, I wouldn't even be talking to you. But you proved you're not like-" I stopped abruptly. I'd almost given something away, something terrible.

"And no," I continued, "I wouldn't tell anyone, ever. Even if you _were _my friend."

He contemplated that for a few minutes. I decided that he looked almost…hopeful-but for what? Something had changed between us, and I briefly wondered if that had anything to do with the expression on his face. My new-found inner strength kept me from fidgeting while I waited for Edward to say something. Eventually my patience was rewarded by a small grin.

"If you're suddenly not afraid of me anymore- and you say you're not- than we can we friends, can't we? And maybe you'll change your mind in the meantime about sharing your secret."

I snorted, making it obvious how much I believed that. The atmosphere was suddenly much lighter and less tense. "Not likely. But as for friendship…maybe. I'm not a very good friend. But you are very accommodating, so we'll see." I said, unwilling to give outright say yes or no. My opinion of him had changed dramatically in such a short time, it was unbelievable.

My response triggered a dazzling half-smile that stretched wide across Edward's face. My breathing picked up speed again…and this time it wasn't from fear. I was suddenly aware of the fact that I was still right next to him. This pricked at my mind, and I couldn't figure out why.

Then my heart stopped as his next few words registered:

"I'll take that as a yes. Now, are you ready to finally leave this room and meet my family?"

* * *

**Note: Bella is realizing that Edward isn't so bad. In fact, he might even be a good thing, because he's helping her deal with her controlling and very heavy handed parents. At the first major turning point in their relationship, she makes subconciously makes the decision to trust him, even if she doesn't realize it. Also, she's never really had friends, again because of her dominating parents. She thinks she'll be bad at it, and is afraid to put faith in others.**

**Tell me what you think: worth continuing, or not? I'll update sooner if it looks like people are interested. Again, I've already written a lot of this in advance plus most of it in Edward's point of view, so I'll be a steady updater if I think that anyone actually wants to read more. Feel free to ask questions!**


	3. Faulty Courage

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. I do, however, own a pair of very sharp ice skates.**

**Chapter 3**

"Wh-what? I thought you were an only child!" I yelped, a new set of worries assailing me.

"Yes…" he agreed slowly.

"And your parents died, from a foreign illness of some sort," I persisted. Pain flashed across his face, and I felt guilty. Briefly I wondered if I would miss my parents when _they _died. Afraid of the answer, I shook that thought away.

"Yes…" he repeated.

I still couldn't quite gather the nerve to give him a glare, so I settled for clamming up and waiting in silence. He looked a little peeved when I refused to play his little game anymore, but relented when he realized he'd already gotten all he could out of me for now; I wasn't comfortable enough with him for this yet.

"I have very close friends that I consider family just as much as I would my parents. They've been waiting to meet you, because you'll likely see them a lot in the near future. You will need to know the household staff, too. Nobody in my life knows you yet; they were kept in the dark as much as I was regarding our arrangement," he informed me, still in his oddly good mood.

Despite Edward's transparent enthusiasm, I was starting to feel a little weak-hearted again. I didn't have friends; it was that simple. The last person I remembered bonding with was a pale little girl named Julie, short for Julia. I'd played with her while her mother was a servant to my household in my youngest years. I never figured out why they left, but recently I'd begun to suspect that my parents had removed anyone that started developing a connection with me. I grew up alone; I didn't understand how anyone could be so close with another person. Now I was beginning to wonder why it had to be that way.

It didn't seem to come as a surprise to Edward that his mention of 'friends' didn't instill any amount of fortitude in me. He observed me as I curled up into a fetal position and hid my face in my hair.

"Don't be that way, Isabella," he pleaded. "I _know_ you'll enjoy their company. Here, I'll even make you an offer. You agree to meet my family, and I'll do something for you-anything."

I lifted my head a fraction. "You're not going to _make_ me meet them?" I demanded, a little taken aback. Why wasn't he forcing me to? It wouldn't violate his promises of not hurting me.

"Of course not! What have I been saying, over and over?" he muttered, sounding aggrieved.

I had to admit, I was a little intrigued. He was giving me a choice-something my mother had assured me I would never have while married- and I was ready to make my decision.

"Alright then. I'll meet them," I said softly, looking at my hands. I was doing this because I had a _choice_. I was going to meet people important to Edward, who was doing his best to make me more comfortable. So why were there tremors spreading through my body? Had I really been so sheltered- and isolated- in my old life that I couldn't even face a handful of strangers when I wasn't in the safety of my own home? Yes, yes I had been that hidden from the world. And this place _was _my home now. I balled my fists up and summoned up all the courage I could, however little it was.

Pulling the blankets and sheets back, I crawled off the bed to search for something decent to wear. That was when it struck me that I didn't know where any of my clothes were. I looked back over my shoulder towards Edward to see him laughing silently, probably mocking me.

It hurt to know he thought of me like that, but at the moment I was more concerned with finding my belongings. In the periphery of my sight, I saw Edward gesture towards the corner opposite the huge desk. I spotted a door, very inconspicuous because its smooth wood carried the same design as the wall. It was adjacent to the washroom, so I wondered briefly how I had missed it before. I marched towards it, wanting to disregard the tingling in my stomach that told me I was still being watched.

The door opened easily, and I could see that it was lined with shelves on one side and a massive dresser that matched the desk in our bedroom on the other. The dresser was lined with intricate carvings that gave an overall appearance of grandeur. A full length mirror took up most of the space on the far side of the walk-closet. More like a small room, really.

All of the personal belongings I had brought with me were evenly dispersed amongst Edward's things. Considering my position in society and my family's overall wealth, I should have had more to my name. My father had justified this lack of basic material goods by saying that it was now someone else's job to care for me now. To him, even I was property. What did it matter to him that I was his own flesh and blood?

I carefully went through the hanging clothes first, instead of attempting a search through the imposing dresser. I settled for a dark blue dress that folded neatly to my body and didn't require the awful, choking corset. I dressed in the closet, not wanting to change in front of Edward; I wasn't entirely certain what our boundaries were now.

A muted thud startled me as I finished up. I opened the closet door again, my fingertips only lightly brushing the cool knob, and peered out.

Edward was standing near the door to the sitting room. He looked at me sheepishly and shrugged. I didn't bother asking what had happened. It didn't look like he wanted to tell me.

"Done?" he asked. I nodded and passed him as he entered the closet. His skin briefly brushed the skin exposed by my elbow-length sleeves. I almost stopped walking, because my body chose that moment to wage an internal war: delight in the strange sensation, or flee?

Thankfully, I kept my composure and made it to the sitting room in enough time to hide my reaction. I sank to the couch gratefully, because my knees were suddenly weak. By the time Edward returned, I was more or less under control of myself.

"Shall we?" he teased, voice light. Probably in an attempt to put me at ease, I reasoned.

He proffered his arm to me, which I promptly refused. His eyes darkened and his bright expression faded some, but he seemed determined to keep the mood casual. I had to give him credit for that, even if I wasn't too keen on feeling any kind of emotion right now at all. A single sigh escaped my lips as we made our way from the relative safety of our room.

***

"No, this way," Edward corrected me as I almost took another wrong turn. I was hopelessly lost already. The Masen home was enormous and confusing; on my first night here, it had been dark and I hadn't taken much notice of my surroundings.

It was truly a house worthy of nobility. Richly woven tapestries and incredibly detailed paintings adorned the light-colored walls. Heavy, soft carpeting lined most of the hallways, and in its absence there was dark wooden flooring covered with expensive rugs. Statues and plants littered the rooms we passed through, and one particular bronze sculpture caught my eye.

It was of a little girl, with her arms around the neck of a rotund puppy. The hound's tail was waving in sheer ecstasy, and looming over the small pair was a man. His eyes portrayed love, but his stance was one of protection. "A true work of art," I noted quietly, observing new details that I had passed over at first glance.

Edward stopped beside me. He gazed at the marvelous figurine. He nodded almost absently, lost in a world of his own.

"My uncle made that, before he died. His forge caught fire and burned his home to the ground. No one survived," he said. His voice was a little off, matching his unfocused expression.

I put my hand to my mouth in horror. "That's terrible! I can't imagine how you must feel," I cried, trying to eradicate the awful pictures painted in my mind. I shuddered, completely unsettled by the thought of burning; I was afraid of fire, or rather, the thought of being burned to death.

Edward tentatively put one arm around my waist, drawing me closer. I went rigid for a few seconds, before slowly relaxing into his side. He was here, I was safe, and I could depend on his protection. I wondered uneasily about how quickly I had shifted my loyalties from my family to Edward, and was shaken by the fact that I was already so trusting of him. I'd known him for what, three days?

We stood there for an immeasurable amount of time, embracing. When I finally slipped free of his hold, my face was flushed.

"So you approve of this now?" Edward murmured in my ear. The heat in my body grew in intensity, making me step back in surprise. Why was I reacting so bizarrely to him?

"Yes, I do." I stated firmly, stunning us both with my clear, bold answer.

"Well, then, you'll have to trust me to do it more often. As a friend, of course," he informed me, his former attitude restored. Good friend indeed, I thought to myself, more than a little sarcastic. My thoughts were safe in my head.

"And you'll have to trust me not to bolt at the first opportunity I get," I retorted, reveling in my unexpected bravery. Apparently, my brain wasn't as securely locked as I thought.

"For some reason, I don't think you will. Not anymore," he responded, eyes thoughtful. I shivered, despite the fact that I wasn't cold or scared anymore. And I couldn't help but think he was right. Possibly more right than either of us knew.

***

Our footsteps echoed hollowly around particular hall that had marble flooring, unlike most of the house I had seen already. We approached set of wide double doors that had brass inlays along alternating portions of the thick wood. Two men uniformed in the standard Masen colors, green and gold, stood guard. Both nodded respectfully as we passed through, though I couldn't help but feel like their demeanor towards me was forced and artificial. The doors opened to a large sunlit garden. I hurried out, wanting to feel the bright sun on my skin.

Around me, thick shrubs and beds of flowers blossomed in an explosion of color. The smells were exquisite, and attracted several buzzing insects and butterfly that flitted about lazily in the summer warmth. I laughed for a minute at the beauty of it all. The sweet air made me feel free, like a bird in the sky.

I was brought back to earth when I caught sight of Edward's expression. He looked dazed. I frowned for a moment, wondering what was wrong. It seemed like everything was going fine this morning to me. Better, in fact, than I had ever expected it to be in such a short time.

Unwittingly Edward answered my question. "Why haven't I heard you laugh before?" he mused, more to himself than to me. I wasn't sure he even knew that I heard him.

The tranquil spell woven by the garden was broken when Edward shook his head and sighed.

"Well, I think Alice and Jasper are already out here. They've got to be around here somewhere."

"They're already here?" I squeaked, unnerved. All the fight went out of me at once, rendering me a pathetic little girl once more.

"They're actually staying here; I asked them to meet us in the garden to give you time to prepare," he explained, giving me a side-long look. "I figured you'd react this way, so I played it safe."

I should have taken offense at his words, but they were all too true. I was quaking like a leaf in the wind. I wasn't quite reduced to tears; it would take a lot more pressure to do that, but that didn't quell the innate fear I felt.

Edward led me along slowly, doubtless afraid that I would trip, being the clumsy person I was. He'd already gathered that much about me. We came upon a wide open space that had several seats spaced out around a little table. There were three people present: first, a young woman with short dark hair and incredibly delicate features, seated in the arrangements furthest from us. Next, a man in his early twenties with sandy blonde hair, who was standing directly behind the girl's seat. And lastly, another man in the Masen uniform, who was just turning to leave.

The first one to spot us was the dark haired girl. She literally bounced up from her seat and whispered something to the man behind her.

Instinctively I grasped Edward's hand tighter. I felt his strong, quiet presence beside me and looked at his face. These people were unknown, and what was unknown was not worth risking. Right?

* * *

**Note: So Bella is starting to feel more and more conflicted. How much does she really trust Edward? She can't control both her negative and positive emotions around him; his very presence triggers powerful reponses from her.**

**So how do you guys like it so far? I've decided to keep writing, but that doesn't mean I won't appreciate some love! (Hint: The more reviews I get, the sooner I post)For the next few chapters, I'm going to post based on reveiws. Later on I'll most likely put new chapters up weekly, to space them out. After all, I did three chapters in two days already!Regarding Edward's POV, I've decided that when this story is moving steadily along, I'll post it speparately. I'll let you all know what it's called when I put it up. **

**I was asked why Edward has dark hair in this story. It's because when I first started writing it, Bound by Fire was based on different characters. When I changed things up a bit, I kept that one characteristic. Once again, feel free to ask questions! **

**P.S. As an incentive, I'm going to give a sneak peek of the next chapter to everyone who reviews! Tell me anything- how I could improve, what your favorite part was, specific characters you'd like me to include, pointing out mistakes, what I should name the chapter, etc. I appreciate any and all input!**


	4. Small Secrets

**I don't own Twilight. I do, however, own an incredibly loud alarm clock.**

**Chapter Four**

The servant departed hastily as we approached. I reflected on that long enough to decide he didn't want to be caught gossiping in front of his lord. I wondered if that meant anything to Edward, but before I could ask, the raven-haired girl gave an ear-splitting squeal and darted towards us.

I flinched, but Edward opened his arms and enveloped the tiny person in a hug, dragging my hand along with him. After a moment, they released each other, and I couldn't say a word because of the incessant chatter pouring from the girl's mouth. I only caught snippets of what she said:

"And we were waiting, but the-"

"Jasper wouldn't listen, but you know better, because-"

"So I finally get to see you, I've been waiting forever, Edward said no to-"

At this last earful of words, I realized she was talking to me. What did she mean by 'I've been waiting forever' and 'I finally get to see you'? I'd been here for all of three days, and the engagement hadn't been known publicly for much longer than that.

Edward interrupted my senseless musing with a brief introduction.

"Alice, this is Lady Isabella. Isabella, this is Alice Brandon Whitlock. The man waiting for us is Jasper, Alice's husband."

I nodded, pretending that I wasn't slowly losing my grip on reality. The strangers who were 'friends' both smiled at me. Alice gasped, the color in her pretty face draining away. She suddenly shied away, as she were a spooked horse.

"I didn't mean to scare you! I really didn't," she cried, dashing off again, this time towards the house. Edward groaned and motioned Jasper over.

The man was tall and leonine, built strongly with sinewy muscles. I fought automatic instinct to be frightened by him; something told me he was dangerous. Even as he approached, I was able to pick out innumerous scars, so many I was surprised he was alive.

"She stopped herself in time?" he asked, concern bright in his eyes.

"Too soon," Edward corrected him. I looked back and forth between the two, disturbed by the perplexing conversation. When Jasper looked my way, I shrank back into Edward's side. Jasper nodded towards Edward, his face suddenly clearing of expression.

"I see why now. My apologies, Isabella. Has your husband already introduced me?" he asked, an oddly pleasant ring to his voice, even though his eyes seemed to have gotten darker…angrier. Oddly enough, I felt calmer now, so I replied in an almost-steady voice instead of a shaky monosyllable. "Yes, he has."

I tried, with absolutely no success, to match the flaring hostility in Jasper's eyes. Things were going downhill from here, and it was completely and utterly inexplicable. There was nothing I could say that would describe the sudden blaze of tension burning its way through us. It didn't help that Alice had behaved so bizarrely; everyone else seemed to know something about her that I didn't. Then again, we all had our secrets-especially me.

When my feeble attempts at normalcy failed, I tore myself free from Edward's grasp; he couldn't fix _this_ mess, especially when no one could explain it. Suddenly I was gasping for breath, the air whipping through my long hair as I ran.

My impulsive nature brought me back to the house, where I could only faintly hear Edward's calls. I scurried through the halls, until they faded away, echoing only in my mind. I tripped and stumbled my way around, blindly searching for our rooms where no one would trouble me.

I finally came to a halt in a room that might have been familiar, if it wasn't spinning around madly, flashes of colors behind my eyes. I sagged to the floor, my back against something cool and hard. I ignored it, the conflicting remorse, alarm, and even anger surging through me in uninhibited pulses.

I settled pieces of myself at a time. My chest heaved as my lungs burned for air; I took deep, steadying breaths to calm my racing pulse. My hands were trembling; I held them tightly around myself. My head pounded in wild abandon; I put it down on my knees and covered my eyes.

Without warning a hand unexpectedly rested on my shoulder, brining me out of my coma-like state of calm. I gave a muffled shriek that was abruptly cut off by someone covering my mouth. I fought in vain, lashing out to strike nothing in the dim room.

"Hush, they'll hear you," a voice whispered somewhere near my shoulder. The alarm fled my body when I recognized the speaker.

Alice pulled her hand from my face, allowing me access to free movement again. I made out her kneeling form next to me. Concern was written across her tiny features as she gazed at me.

"Alice?" I managed, apprehension creeping through me like poison though veins. "What are you doing here?"

A smile tugged at her lips, all traces of her earlier distress gone. "Might I ask you the same? I'm here so Edward and Jasper won't find me. Now they're looking for you too, it seems."

"Yes...but why are _you_ h-" I was abruptly cut off when Alice grabbed onto my arm and pulled me to the left and backwards. I now saw the thing digging into my backside was the same statue I had admired earlier, but now we were behind it instead of in front. Hurried footsteps went past the entrance to the room. Another, slower, set neared us. My heartbeat picked up speed in the ensuing silence.I caught a glimpse of someone's face peering into the darkened room before continuing down the hall.

"He's sent the servants looking," Alice commented beside me, her large eyes narrowed.

"How do you know? Never mind, I don't care. Just tell me why you ran." I practically pleaded. It dawned on me that I was losing my negative perspective of her. She had barely said a word to me, but I knew she was different, somehow. Like me?

"I was going to scare you. By knowing something about you- something from your past- that I'm not supposed to know. That's all I can tell you, or you'll act like…other people," she stopped, hiding her expression by looking away from me.

On a whim, I reached out and touched her shoulder. She turned and looked at me with surprise. "I don't know what you know, or how you found it out, but its all right. Please, just don't tell anyone."

Our eyes met and a moment of sheer understanding swept between us. We needed no words to communicate; she understood I needed space, and I understood she was different somehow, but she wouldn't give up my secrets.

It was peculiar to me, the concept that I was even capable of trusting someone so closely when I'd met them mere minutes ago. I took this as a sign-a sign that Edward was right about friendship.

***

Surprisingly at ease, I let Alice lead me to her rooms. Our moods had improved considerably, but I wasn't miraculously talkative; even I didn't expect that, though Alice was certainly happy enough to speak for the two of us. Her questions, although very personal, didn't shake me. I .was handling this, and she was helping me like Edward tried to-just in a different way.

"So Edward is married to you? What did you think of your first night?" she asked , grinning wickedly when she spotted the deep blush adorning my face.

"We didn't have a first night…at least not by the terms you are referring to. I'm a coward. I can't even look at strangers without running away. Your husband terrifies me," I mumbled, not meeting her eyes. I didn't want her to notice the shame I felt. To my relief, she pulled away from the topic, the knowing look on her face almost painful to see. That, however, quickly changed to confusion.

"Jasper? You're afraid of _Jasper_?" she demanded. I nodded, not even bothering to speak.

"He's one of the best men in the world, Bella. You'll see," she decided for me. I disagreed with her, but was preoccupied with a nagging thought that persistently dragged at my mind until I paid it heed.

"You called me Bella." I accused her, breaking out of my reverie. She stared at me before bursting into laughter. It was melodious and sounded like bells. It suited her completely.

"Of course I did, Isabella is too long to say repeatedly. I like Bella better, anyway. It means beautiful."

I wasn't expecting her response, and I was touched. I had made a new friend-my only friend, besides possibly Edward- and a nickname all in one day. For once, I was overwhelmed by positive emotions. It was a vast difference from the intensely concentrated pressure I'd been feeling for days now.

I smiled. Alice must have noticed, because her already wide grin spread further. When the door suddenly rattled, I jerked to my feet, remembering why I was here in Alice's rooms in the first place. "Alice!" I heard someone shout through the door. It sounded like Jasper.

"These are my rooms too! Unlock the door. Isabella is missing. Can you tell where she is?" he called, still communicating through the door. I glanced at Alice, eyes wide. I really didn't want to face Jasper right now.

"I'm sorry, I can't see her. She's difficult to spot," she responded, shrugging my direction. I was grateful she didn't give me away, but was completely baffled. What on earth was that supposed to mean? "And I'm not opening the door. I need some time to myself, Jasper."

I heard Jasper sigh. "Alright, Alice. If you need me, I'll be outside. Please don't make me worry too long," he requested before the room faded back into silence. We waited a few minutes, then Alice opened the door.

"He's gone. You'll have to hurry, though. I sure he'll be back to check on me soon. Go to…" she hesitated, like she was thinking it over. "Your room. Go to your room," she instructed me, pointing out a direction. I obeyed at once, taking off down the halls. Incredibly, I was able to find Edward and I's bedchamber within moments. I plunged inside, ridiculously relieved, as if this still unfamiliar room could somehow protect me.

I took a seat on the couch in our sitting room. I noted with surprise that it was fairly comfortable for a mostly decorative object. Then again, Edward might have favored comfort over taste. I leaned back, savoring the feel of the soft cushions against my back, which was battered from the statue prodding into me.

I was almost caught unawares when the door opened. The hinges obviously needed care; they sounded like cracking wood, punctuating the air with splinters of sound. I was puzzled as to how I hadn't noticed it before, but quickly disregarded that thought. I had more urgent problems- such as Edward, making his presence known by literally stalking across the room, though his movements were still sinuous and controlled.

"Where were you?" he demanded. I was taken aback by the tortured sound of his voice. His face was bone-pale and his eyes were dark and bleak.

"I was here," I quivered, suddenly doubting the faith I had so carelessly invested in him. Edward, as if realizing this, inhaled sharply before taking a seat beside me, obviously regaining a semblance of control. "I had no idea where you were, because you certainly weren't here. This was one of the first places I checked, Isabella.

I was worried that he was angry- it would make sense, because I lied to him- but he looked fairly calm now. There was even a hint of tight humor bordering his expression. "We haven't even eaten breakfast yet, and now it's time for lunch."

I was dismayed. With the lack of light in the rooms that didn't have windows, I had lost track of time. Everything felt surreal, so I never realized I was so hungry until my stomach let out a gurgling moan.

I was embarrassed, but Edward only shook his head in mock horror. "Now the Masen lord's bride is trying to waste away on top of everything else," he teased. I didn't find it funny, but I allowed a smile to form. Encouraged, Edward offered his hand to me, ready to help me up. Remembering this morning, I accepted.

This seemed to reassure Edward. He helped me up, though he seemed excessively careful to avoid physical contact. This bothered some hidden part of me that wasn't completely scarred and broken. That little piece was swelling up, expanding enough for me to notice it. And at the moment, it was demanding I do something differently, no matter the consequences.

And so, I did. Edward had shown me compassion and kindness. He had revealed himself to me and given me a friend. And I wanted him to know how drastically my life had been altered by him, in such a short time. How he had gone from the antagonist to my protector, a vigilant guardian. I _needed_ him to know. I twisted sideways in his grasp and leaned towards him, my face shockingly close to his. Too close to breathe.

* * *

**Notes: Bella is forging odd but powerful connections with new people. There is a mystery surrounding Alice and Jasper, and Bella's realationship with Edward is advancing dramatically.**

**So, what do you guys think? What's going to happen? I made you wait this time-I feel a little guilty, but more people reviewed. Speaking of, I thank all of you who reviewed. My apologies to Waterpaw, who didn't get the promised sneak peek that all other Ch.3 reviewers got. I will try to make it up somehow. Anyone who wants a Ch.5 sneak peak, please review!**

**If you have questions, feel free to ask. I don't mind if anyone points out errors, or wants to make a guess about the plot! **

**You can reach me here: TheSilverBookWyrm yahoo (dot)com **

**Just take away the spaces and add the dot.**

**Please R&R!**


	5. Can't Breathe

**I don't own Twilight. I do, however, own an unwelcome case of the flu.**

**Chapter Five**

My heart was pounding wildly, out of control. Edward's face was a frozen mask of shock as my lips touched his. My intentions to lightly touch his cheek turned to dust the moment I made contact. Fire burned through my body as I held my mouth to Edward's. My breath was coming in erratic gasps, lungs dragging in air. It was like being burned in a painless fire, and I loved it. Until I realized what I was doing.

Abruptly I broke our connection, mortified. Edward stood motionless, unresponding. The sudden sting of rejection and chagrin knotted in my stomach. I turned in an instant, yanking out of his arms and dashing from the room. Running again, as always.

I made it two corners away from the room before a pair of strong arms encircled my waist and yanked me to a halt. My face was burning red with unnamed emotion and humiliation as I was spun around and made to look up.

"You kissed me, Bella," said Edward, eyes fixated on my face. I searched desperately inside of myself for that part of me that had been so eager to make a change. It was gone, that traitorous thing.

And then, it didn't matter anymore. Edward leaned down and put his mouth to mine. My instinctive paranoia ebbed away as my lips moved in synchronization with his. Molten lava flowed through my veins. Heat pulsed like an electric current between every place our bodies were connected.

When we finally broke apart, I opened my eyes-I didn't even remember closing them- and let Edward support my weight, with his arms still holding my waist. He probably thought I was ready to bolt a second time. I reassured him by taking my hands off his shoulders and placing them around his back to pull him closer.

We were still in this position when I spotted movement in a darkened doorway over Edward's shoulder. Alice's small outline was barely visible, but I still caught sight of her expression before she backed away and left without a sound. Edward felt me stiffen and immediately he dropped his arms and stepped back, leaving me with space that I no longer craved.

"I'm sorry," he said, voice low and subdued. "I shouldn't have assumed."

He looked torn, like he was half elated and half ridden with guilt. I understood that. He broke a promise-but then again, I instigated the whole situation. The strength of my sudden physical need was shocking and scared me to death. Underneath it all I was starting to wonder if this was even natural.

"But you were right," I told him. I was lying. He was much, much more than right, but I wasn't going to tell him that.

Instead of replying, Edward took my hand. "Lunch awaits, Bella."

And so do Alice and Jasper, I added to myself.

***

Lunch was short and quiet. Alice watched me nearly the whole time, uncharacteristically silent. Probably dying to ask me about my relationship, if I knew anything about her from our brief time together. Edward was talking to Jasper about something to do with the king, but I wasn't quite sure what. He sounded slightly troubled, but I barely noted this. My head was spinning with the recent turns in my relationships in my new world. Friends. Trust. Love. Love? No, not love. Love was out of the question. It wasn't even an answer, let alone a factor. It didn't exist-for me, anyway. I might be able to handle a physical relationship to the point of producing a heir. Nothing more.

Thinking of this made me wonder, with trepidation, if Edward thought this meant he could become more… physical, for lack of a better word, with me. Was that his only motive for his kissing me? Was his kindness only a hoax? I had no idea why he was being so callous so suddenly. He wasn't talking to me, or really even looking in my direction at all.

I was yanked from my foggy reverie by the feeling of Jasper's eyes on me. He kept a steady watch on me throughout the whole meal. Alice shot glares him, glares that he didn't see, because he was occupied with observing both Edward and I.

For some reason, being near him gave me the most peculiar sensation- I remained mostly calm, and wanted to trust him, and yet I was still paralyzed by the looks he passed in my direction. Why this was so I couldn't even begin to guess.

When we finished our lunch, Alice retired to her rooms, claiming to have a headache. Jasper soon followed suit, leaving me alone with Edward again.

An awkward silence ensued as we left the room. I wasn't actually certain where we were heading, because my sense of direction hadn't improved in the slightest. He lead and I followed. Neither of us said a word, though I felt as though my hand was too empty. Like I needed to have something there.

The bizarre, unnatural sensation of longing vanished when his hand took mine, casually enough to make it seem right. It certainly felt that way. I glanced up at him, expecting to see the jovial expression I was getting used to. Instead I saw a twisted kind of anguish. Edward's eyes burned with something I couldn't even begin to understand.

I made a little choking noise, holding in the powerful urge to cry. I was always too weak to control myself. Now was no exception. Little rivulets of salty water were running down my face.

Even in my state of constantly shifting, knife-edge emotions, I still knew the minute strong arms wrapped around my shoulders and under my knees, lifting me up. The ground fell away as Edward carried me, my sniffling now muffled by his body.

I heard a door slam, and then I was in Edward's lap, clutching the front of his shirt while he sat down on something. I waited, and soon enough the water from my eyes ceased to flow.

"I was beginning to think it was your intention to drown us both," Edward said. A startled hiccup of laughter burst out of me, surprising us both. I sighed and wiped at my eyes. I needed to gain some semblance of self-control, so that Edward would tell me what I wanted to know.

"Bella, I know what I did was wrong. I shouldn't be so impulsive, but-"

I cut him off immediately. "You called me Bella. You did that earlier, too," I said bluntly. He looked down at me, incredulous. I was suddenly conscious that I was in his lap still, pressing into his hard chest. I was all too aware of his face, only inches from mine, and how inappropriate this was. Then again, we were married. Did that make this right?

"You just suffered from a panic attack. I _kissed_ you, for god's sake! And you're thinking about the fact that I called you Bella? Unbelievable," he muttered in disbelief. I only sat there, silent. I didn't have to wait for long.

"I call you Bella because it is short for Isabella, and more convenient for everyday use," he explained, sounding more than a little exasperated.

"Why do you care, Edward?" I asked quietly. His brow furrowed in confusion.

"Why do I care?" he repeated slowly, as if he wasn't quite sure what I was asking. "About calling you Bella?"

"No, about…me. Or rather, how I feel. What you do for me," I tried to clarify.

"I don't understand what you mean. What have I done for you, other than force myself upon you?" he asked bitterly, voice saturated with chagrin.

I blinked uncertainly. "You've never done that," I argued. "Tell me when you've done something even remotely close."

"I _married_ you, for one. You were clearly unwilling. Then I chased you down the corridors and forced you to kiss me. You are clearly hurt in some way, and I just keep ripping that pain deeper. Do you not see that?"

The memory of Edward grabbing me and kissing me burned anew in my mind, and I knew he was wrong. I had wanted it to happen. I hadn't fought him, not like I would have not that long ago. To him, it was his entire fault. He didn't see just how skewed his impression of me was.

"No, Edward. You're not hurting me. You're sewing up the hole in me. Making me see that some people are worth knowing. You've already saved me from more than I'll ever be able to tell you. I can't do the same for you. That first night, any other man would have used me. Taken away my virginity by force, because it would his right as my husband. But you didn't. And you still haven't. That's why I want to know why you care about me."

He stared at me, mouth agape, for a long time. Eventually he gained control of himself, and this time when he spoke, his voice was flat and toneless. "I don't honestly know, Bella. I heard many things about you before I met you, but you are so different from what I imagined. You seem almost fragile…and yet I know almost nothing about you. You won't tell me what has scarred your memories, and I can do nothing until I you do."

"I'll never tell you. It's not something I can do."

"But why, Bella? Why can't you tell me?" he pleaded.

"I just can't. Please, I don't want to talk about it," I begged him, wishing he would leave it alone. "Tell me why you were upset when we left lunch."

"I was just angry, mostly at myself. For taking advantage of you before we ate, and then acting as if you didn't exist to ward off the guilt."

As I watched, his eyes grew pained and dour. He was tearing himself up over something so simple…and that was so like me it was almost scary.

"Well, I don't see it that way," was all I said, but the saturnine aura seemed to lift a bit from his face.

I pulled away then, because our proximity was still intimidating. I noticed, with some degree of shame, that his shirt had damp spots across the front from me. That's when I realized that we were in a completely unfamiliar room that I had, until now, completely failed to notice.

We were in a room filled with buttery sunlight drifting in from the windows. Gauzy drapes hung by their sides. The carpeting was soft and various shades of cream or brown, matching the softly illuminated walls. Antique furniture, including a desk that bore many similarities to the one in our room, was dispersed throughout the room. The two of us were on a sofa that was soft and comfotable, but still went well with the decor.

Edward noticed my preoccupation, and attempted a weak, lopsided grin that managed to make my heart stutter. "This is my private study. I come here when I don't want anyone to bother me. It's right across the hall from our bedroom," he informed me.

"You can come here any time you need to be alone," he added softly. When he said that, I felt an instinctive wariness inside of me relax, because now I had a sanctuary that I could depend on. If I was still home, that place of security would have been our home's library. I was the only person who ever bothered to go in there, and the rows upon rows of old, dusty books had delighted me to no end.

When Edward shifted beneath me, I decided, almost reflexively, that I'd spent enough time so close to him. For a minute I thought he was going to kiss me, his face was so close to mine. My breathing grew a little ragged, and I hurriedly moved off of him and into a chair a few feet away.

I spotted the fleeting look of disappointment ghost across Edward's face before it vanished. He stood up immediately, and walked over to the desk.

"How well do you read?" Edward asked, fingering a little globe that occupied a corner of the glossy mahogany wood. I was puzzled, but answered nearly as soon as he asked.

"Well enough to read _Joed's Ascension_ last year." I shrugged. He was watching me now with apparent surprise at my skill. "I was tutored for a long time. I can read and speak a few other languages, too."

As soon as I said it, I wished I could take it back. Until now, I hadn't willingly offered any information about myself without being directly asked. It would probably look like bragging, too.

Instead, Edward cracked a grin. "You've outsmarted me already. You're too good to be a wife. Intelligent, and pretty enough to marry have married the prince, if you'd wanted to," he teased.

I flinched when he said the word _wife_, but blushed a deep scarlet at the unexpected praise. My pleasure, however, dissolved at once when I realized he was probably offended that I would be so presumptuous. I looked down and away, avoiding his gaze.

My eyes roamed the room before settling on an object sitting on a shelf by the side wall. My blood chilled suddenly, and my eyes went wide when I realized what it was.

* * *

**Notes: Bella is starting to crave the unexpected feelings that Edward gives her. She is also revealing little bits of her past as she wonders about Edward and Jasper.**

**For everyone who reviewed Chapter Four to get a Chapter Five sneak peak, you will get your sneak peak of Chapter Six instead. I didn't have time to send them out.**

**Thank you everyone that reviewed! It's a wonderful thing to know that other people want me to keep writing and even share interests with me. Here is are two questions for you all: 1) What do you think Bella sees? 2) What is your favorite breed of dog?**

**If you have questions, feel free to ask. I don't mind if anyone points out errors, or wants to make a guess about the plot! **

**You can reach me here: TheSilverBookWyrm at yahoo (dot)com **

**Just take away the spaces and add the dot.**

**Please R&R!**


	6. Epiphany

**I do not own Twilight. I do, however, own a bag of chips that will not be here much longer.**

**Chapter Six**

"Edward, why do you have bottle of Hyronidian?" I asked. I watched as he stiffened, then turned around slowly to face me.

"Why wouldn't I?" he asked, each word sounding cold and forced.

"Because it's banned. How did you get it?"

Edward stopped fidgeting and cast his eyes away from my face.

"You know what it is," he stated unnecessarily, not really asking.

I fiddled with the ring on my finger, unwilling to meet his eyes. My thoughts were twisting madly, trying to think of a minutely good reason to have such a thing in his possession. Try as I might, I could only come up with one thing: murder.

My breathing grew a little faster, and I could feel the paranoia bubbling up like acid. "Edward," I began unsteadily, "who are you trying to kill?"

The room became audibly quieter. I winced when he gritted his teeth.

"No one, Lady Isabella. The poison isn't for me to use."

He finally looked up, and his verdantly green eyes caught mine. I held his gaze in disbelief. "Why should I believe you?" I asked shrilly. A thousand scenarios ran through my imagination. I was here alone with him in a room containing deadly liquids, pressing him for information. Edward stepped closer, and I thought my heart would stop beating. And to know that I had let him kiss me only hours earlier!

"Why shouldn't you? You said yourself that I haven't wronged you. Was I mistaken to listen to your words?" he demanded. He obviously knew what I was thinking. I shrank back into the seat in the face of his sudden hostility.

Briefly I wondered if he heard my sharp intake of breath, but I refused to answer him. My automatic reaction to panic was to shut down; I would feel no pain, or fear, if I was numb, locked away in the shadowed depths of my own mind.

At first, when I didn't answer, he just sighed deeply and leaned on the chair nearest to me. Several long minutes later, I was vaguely aware him towering over me.

"Bella?" I heard him say. Concern blossomed in his voice, and I felt his hands, warm and calloused, on my shoulders.

"Bella!" I heard him cry, now sharp and laced with alarm. The sound of his voice jolted me out of my numbed, emotionless state, as shocking as if icy water was splashing on my face.

I tugged at his hold on me, and he let go. He loomed over my sitting form, but his face was etched with relief.

"Alright, I'll tell you. But don't be judgmental, and remember that I'm trusting you, even if you won't put the same faith in me," he muttered, eyeing me. I shuddered.

A little lump formed in my throat and made it a little harder to speak, so I nodded my acceptance.

"My uncle, the one that died in the fire? His name was Aro. He was King Caius's brother. My father and Marcus were the two youngest siblings. No one knew much about them. My father was a prince, though I'm not, because my blood isn't royal enough to take the throne, and there are several people in line to inherit before me," he said, all in one long breath. He watched my face with caution, though I wasn't sure how he expected me to react.

"So you are indirectly related to the king?" I made certain. He seemed considerably relieved to hear me speak. When he nodded, I felt the air rush from my lungs. "That doesn't explain why you have a toxic substance in your private study."

"It leads to how Jasper made attempt on my life. That's how I met him, you know. He's a trained assassin and in any circumstances likely the most dangerous person you will ever meet."

***

I reached and covered my mouth while I yawned, out of sheer habit. My belly was full, and I was pleasantly warm. I sank deeper into the arm chair and relaxed my stiff muscles. Being on edge at a near constant rate had its negative effects on both mind and body.

I glanced over at Edward, who was in a chair opposite from mine. I was suddenly struck by how domestic this scene was. A wife and her husband, relaxing in their private study by a warm blaze, soon to go to bed… and do very little other than sleep. I was driving myself mad over this- I seemed to have developed a relentless obsession with the topic.

I thought back to earlier, when Edward told me how he met Jasper, and why he was storing such dangerous chemicals in his rooms. I had to admit, I'd believed something very different than I was told- and now, it was only a little better, because I was aware of just how dangerous Jasper was. It made me that much more dependent on Edward, though I wasn't quite sure if that was a good thing or not.

A slow, stealthy fog crept across my vision. By the time I realized I was drifting, I was already lost in the sweet-smelling haze. I felt like I was in a boat, on a gently rocking sea. I imagined I saw green stars in the sky above, shining with such fervor and strength it stole my breath away.

The swaying ceased unexpectedly, and I struggled to sit up, bleary eyed, until I realized I was being lowered to my bed.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you. I carried you to our room because you were sleeping so deeply," I thought heard Edward murmur softly from somewhere nearby. I was still mostly asleep, and didn't notice that I had latched onto Edward, not even when he tugged gently at my hands. There was a soft chuckle before the world ceased to filter through to my awareness.

***

I blinked lazily, and felt a familiar sensation prick at my memory. I debated it inwardly for what I deemed to be an eternity before I decided to move. As soon as I realized I couldn't, I figured out what was nagging at my mind. I 'd woken up in a near identical position yesterday- which meant Edward and I were splayed haphazardly across the bed, with my head on his chest and his arms around me, holding me to him as if I were a precious doll or beloved toy of a young child.

Instead of stealing away as I had tried to the day before, I loosened the tense muscles of my body and forced them to calm, though it was difficult with the heat buzzing through me and curling in odd ways in my stomach.

I laid there for a long time, mulling over the fact this was only my third day waking up in this room, and the fourth day of my marriage to Edward. In some bizarre way, it felt like I had been here for weeks, not a handful of sunrises.

I felt the rise and fall of Edward's chest pick up speed as he awoke. I stilled myself, because for some indistinct reason I wanted to maintain the appearance that I was still asleep.

Eventually, when Edward made no move to rouse me, I rolled off of him-being very careful to ignore the heat flashes and chills it gave me- and proceeded to yawn again. My eyes sought put his, and I spotted an edge of guilt in them. I immediately propped myself up, and realized that I was still in my clothes from the day before. I looked at Edward inquiringly, and he offered me sort half-smile that went well with his features, melding itself there.

"You fell asleep, so I carried you in here. You were sleeping deeply enough that you didn't wake up until I put you down. I would have offered you a choice about sleeping in the same bed but… you were asleep, and wouldn't let go of me."

I watched as he grinned wider, revealing straight, white teeth. I felt my face grow warm, and wished that I had even an ounce more of control over my body. Instead, the persistent internal tugging in my abdomen was trying to align itself-with Edward. I fought severely against the urge to lean forward.

As if noticing my preoccupation, Edward angled himself enough to form a little hollow formed by the crook of his arms.

"Come here," he whispered, and I shivered, though I wasn't chilled.

I hesitated, and in that minute I had an epiphany; I, so far, had found no reason to disbelieve Edward's intentions, desperately craved his nearness, and now I knew I had to give up my life of doubt. This place was different from my home. I was going to have to grow out of my circle of surety and extend my existence into realms of understanding I'd never even breached before. And in a way, my short time as a Masen had already changed me enough to find the inward strength necessary. I was ready to find my own place in the world.

Feigning indifference, I allowed myself to be tucked into his cradling embrace, where I settled down and passed by the early, serene morning.

When dawn had fully passed and lost its hold on the earth, the two of us split, and the spell of easy peace woven between us was broken.

Edward and I had our morning meal in the study, which I found odd but refrained from commenting on.

Edward was the first to break the silence when we were satisfied. "Bella, does it bother you that I'm six years older than you?"

His question startled me, especially as it came so unexpectedly. I observed his expression and it shifted between sorrow and hope. The light cast a pallor over his skin that failed to dampen his strong features.

I caught my lip between my teeth and considered how to answer without offending him. "A few days ago, yes, it did." I saw the anticipation fade from his face, and I hurried to finish. "But now, I don't. I t makes no difference, be it a day or a hundred years."

The look on Edward's face was enough to keep at bay the worry for having said something so private aloud. It was as if the sun was abruptly unveiled, glorious in all its grandeur. I realized that I wasn't breathing and mentally chided myself.

Edward stood from his place at the dark-wooded table and pulled my chair out for me so I could do the same. He took my hand and helped me up. I attempted to take a step towards the doorway, assuming that we were going somewhere, but Edward kept a hold of my hand and placed it on his face. I gasped as I felt the smooth flawlessness of his skin, and impulsively ran my fingers along the edge of his jaw, and putting my right hand on his shoulder.

I had the powerful urge to check the room to make sure no one saw us, though I knew the door was locked. All thought went out the window like a butterfly on a thermal wind when I realized that Edward was leaning towards me, and the hot ball of heatless fire stirred in my belly. Over Edward's shoulder, however, I noticed that the little bottle of poison was gone.

* * *

**Notes: Okay, so this is really just a filler chapter that was neccesary for the plot to keep moving, but it does contain some foreshadowing. **

**I hope you guys liked this chapter, even though it was short and slow (and maybe sweet?). The next one will be much longer! This was actually supposed to be a part of the next chapter, but Chapter Six and Seven were too long and this part was irrelevant, so I cut it out and put something up to entertain you all until I next post.**

**As always, I thank everyone who stops to review, and hope you will continue to do so...because I'm getting far more 'Favorite Author' and "Favorite Story' notices than reviews...**

**Here are my new questions: 1) Do you like dogs or cats better? 2) Do you like warm or cool weather better?**

**Remember, R&R!**


	7. Revelations

**I do not own Twilight. I do own, however, a pair of fuzzy pink socks.**

**Chapter Seven**

Edward's face neared mine, and sparks of tension exploded in my stomach, making me shake with both utter distress and tightly coiled anticipation. When his hand touched the back of my neck to draw me closer, though, I went rigid in his arms. The memories washed over me with the brute force of a tidal wave, triggering the terror I had once felt to return and mutilate my mind once more. I felt the hand of another, more aggressive man, holding my neck, squeezing…

Darkness swept before my eyes, and I fought his gentle constraints wildly, kicking and slamming my fists into his chest and seeing the surprise freeze on his face before bolting to the door and struggling with the lock. I felt rather than saw Edward cross the space between us, and pull me from the door despite my crazed shrieks of protest.

When he pushed me down onto the couch, the fury and mindless panic that controlled my entire being rippled in fear as he held me down.

"No, no! Let me go!" I wailed, thrashing violently in his grip. I glimpsed grim determination harden Edward's sharp features, and he held me with an unbreakable hold, until the madness ebbed from my limbs, and I saw who was restraining me. Not an apparition of torment from times past, but a man who was staring down at me with a stricken expression on his face.

I moaned and turned my face downward and pressed it into the couch. I didn't want to face him. Each minute I spent with him was filled with either craving for his presence, fear, or humiliation.

I felt fingers softly stroking the back of my head, and I resisted the urge to lift my head and look at Edward.

"Tell me why you cannot bear to be touched." His voice was soft and cradling, but I knew that the iron edge would reveal itself if I resisted. I shook my head, still pressed to the cushioned fabric, and refused to speak.

As I'd expected, the underlying tone in Edward's voice shifted, becoming steely rather than yielding. "I would have waited for you to tell me at your own speed, but I no longer think that would be the most beneficial thing for you; you're endangering yourself. I told you two highly personal secrets about myself, and yet you tell me nothing. Every time I believe us to have progressed something happens to draw you back into that… that _shell_ of yours. As a friend-or more- tell me, please, what it is that haunts you so," he finished, still running his hand over my hair and down my back. He sounded unbearably frustrated, and at last I dared to meet his eyes. And knew that I could no longer hide _this_ secret from him.

I sat up, and he removed his hand. I felt a twinge of disappointment, but shrugged it away. I grabbed at the brim of my skirts and, still wordless, pulled them upwards. Edward watched me, confusion in his eyes and his posture undeniably tense.

"Bella, stop, what are you do-" he stopped abruptly, when I glared furiously at him.

"I'm showing you. Look." I ordered, the dread I felt fueling my uneasiness and making me brave enough to continue. When I realized just holding the dress up would only hinder me, I yanked the whole thing over my head, disregarding the looks Edward gave me. I was left standing in only my underclothes, red and oddly enough, calm, as though I wasn't showing something that I'd always vowed to keep hidden.

Edward opened his mouth again, probably to demand that I explain myself, when I pointed to the back of my knees. He frowned but kneeled to the ground to see what I was gesturing at. It was intimidating, having him so close to me while mostly unclothed, but I reminded myself it didn't matter. He had seen me in a similar state not all that long ago.

Feeling Edward's still uncomprehending gaze on my bare legs, I finally traced out two fine white lines that twisted in no particular direction, both on the back of my left knee. Then I showed him several more on the other, trying not to squirm beneath his observant gaze.

"Bella, what are you showing me? You were injured as a child?" he speculated, still not understanding. I shook my head and prepared to show him more.

"Look at my back. Closely. And my neck too," I whispered. I waited, unable to see his expression from behind me, and aching with the repressed urge to ask.

For a long time there was only silence behind me, and then I felt hands tracing the marks on my back, making me shiver, and yet I was no longer fearful, or cold. When Edward spoke, it was as if shards of ice were lodged in his voice, splintering into a thousand wintery pieces. "This was no accident, whatever left you scarred and broken. It looks as though you shouldn't even be alive. Who did this to you, Bella?" The cold hard fury of his voice was disturbing, and I knew that I should be fearful. Again, I wasn't. Instead, I offered up the truth that had haunted me for the last seven years.

"Lord Charles Swan. My father."

***

The strain in the room was palpable, and neither of us moved. I, because I still awaiting a response, and Edward seemed frozen- a blank mask of wordless horror, and then slowly, a thawing that changed to the dead fury that had gripped his voice moments before. I could literally see the understanding as it crept through his thoughts, worming its way inside.

"Your father did this to you? Your own _father_?" he cried, ashen and sounding as though he was going to be ill. I cringed, only for a millisecond it seemed, but Edward still caught the motion and immediately stood, and picked up my dress from where it was laying tangled and forgotten on the floor. Instead of taking it, I stood too, hands clenched.

"Since I was ten. My mother never stopped him. She didn't even try," I forced out from between my numb, shaking lips. "You didn't see them before because it was dark the only time I was ever this revealed to you. And I took great pains to keep them hidden." I added, finally explaining what covered my back. A multitude of white or pink scars, carved deep into the skin, from my neck to my knees. "They healed well, because a doctor attended them. Always the same doctor. And now, do you see what is wrong with me? I thought all men were like him…but I was wrong. And yet, I still sometimes cannot bear your touch. I feel like _he _is there, ready to leave another scar."

He listened to my every word before walking over to his desk. For a moment, my confusion reigned freely, for it looked as if he was merely getting something. Instead, he slammed his curled fist into the desk with enough force that the jars of ink rattled and one nearly tipped. Disregarding this, I wondered why he seemed so tortured. How much did he really care?

When he turned around, my legs, unbidden, carried me to him. It didn't matter that I was so underdressed. I just slid into his arms, holding myself to him. In response I felt his muscular arms go around my shoulders, easily felt through the thin shift that hid very little of my body.

"Why is it that I can sometimes hold you, but other times it triggers a…reaction, whatever you wish to call it?" I shook my head despairingly.

"I don't know. I only know that you scared me. Maybe now that you know about my past, I will panic less," I murmured the only consoling thing that I could think of. I would have rather focused on the warmth that was Edward's arms around me.

When Edward led me back to the couch, I glances at it and ran my fingers along the edges of the light gold fabric, thinking about how it already contained several memories for me- both good and bad.

I sat down, with Edward next to me, and wondered how to say what I was so desperate to have out of me, drifting in the air between us. I started by accepting the pale cotton dress from Edward, and waited until I was fully clad to begin.

"Edward. I know that I'm…for lack of a better word, broken, on the inside. But you are piecing me together, like no else has before. No one else has ever even _tried_. And you make me feel…" I struggled to find the right word to use. There were none that came to mind so I improvised. "strange, in the pit of my belly, but in a good way. And I feel impulses, and wants, that I could never have imagined. I actually _want_ to be with you, and not just because I feel safe around you."

At my admission, I waited for Edward to speak. The trembling that started in my lower belly spread throughout my entire being as the Lord Edward Masen gathered me up in his arms and kissed me. And, despite every circumstance that declared otherwise, I kissed him back.

***

_Two weeks later…_

"Let me see!" I giggled, a relatively new way for me to express myself. Around Edward and Alice, I was open, revealing more of my character than I'd ever expected. In the presence of even one other person, even a servant, I snapped shut like a clam and attached myself to Edward's arm. I didn't want to look needy to the people who saw us, but I appreciated the fact that Edward never seemed to mind. He assured me that he would rather have me with him than to have a distant, unfeeling wife. The truth was, I couldn't stand being away. His mere presence soothed me, made me feel safe and calm. He was like the antidote to my poisoned soul, keeping at bay the relentless wariness of others.

Alice was the only other one that knew about me and my scarred interior and aided me regardless. Despite this powerful bond the tiny person had managed to forge between us, that did nothing to alleviate my annoyance as the pair that pieced my life back together led me through the now familiar corridors with my eyes covered.

"We're almost there!" the dark-haired girl trilled. She reminded me of a fairy, or a pixie perhaps. Something small and mischievous.

I felt the cool air of early morning touch my face, and would have glared at her if I could see. They both knew how much I hated surprises. "Where are we going?" I asked. Other than the gardens, I rarely left the house. I knew I wasn't being led to the gardens because the air lacked powerful, earthy smells, and the sweet scent of late-summer blooms.

A heard a deep, throaty chuckle behind me as I complained about my lack of sight. Suddenly Edward lifted his hands from my eyes and I gazed uncomprehendingly at a tall, brick structure with huge wooden doors that were hanging wide open. The smell of hay and animals permeated the air.

Edward and Alice laughed at the look on my face.

"Come on, hurry up!" Alice squealed, already trying to drag me into what I now saw was a stable. I offered no resistance, and soon we were walking down the long rows of horses that the Masens-which meant Edward-owned, for riding and pulling carriages. I peered at the engraved copper name plates that were embedded into the wood of each stall. _Rocky, Thunder, Matilda, Bear, Silky, Rosebud, Smallheart, _I read to myself. Alice suddenly stopped in front of the one labeled _Pegasus._

"This is my horse." She declared proudly, stroking the nose of a little white speckled mare that was more likely a pony than a horse. I laughed at her. "Pegasus? Who named it?" I asked. She pouted at me, obviously put out a little at my amusement.

"She did, a few years ago." Edward told me, because Alice was now bounding off again, not waiting for us. When our unhurried pace brought us to another stall, she was already recovered from her little fit. She pointed at the nameplate of this one. _Silver Bells_, it read.

"And this, Bella, is _your _horse."

I gasped. Mine? I leaned over stall's lower door. The horse, who was undoubtedly much larger than Pegasus, was a soft grey, with darker dapples adorned her back and rump. Her mane and tail were a flowing black that were matched only by the midnight sky. I gazed at her, transfixed, and softly rubbed her velvety nose. She whickered and nuzzled my arm, then rested her large head on my shoulder and blew at my hair. I drew back with a little laugh of delight.

"She likes you," I heard Edward say.

"Is she really mine?" I asked. At Edward's and Alice's twin nods, I almost squealed; I was acting enough like Alice that it scared me.

Then my face fell. "I can't ride though." I sighed, looking back at the beautiful horse dejectedly. Alice just grinned and waited. Edward, with the skill of much practice, hid his surprise at my lack of ability. It was becoming almost expected for me to not know most of what many young lords and ladies did.

"We can teach you. And we'll have to call the mare Silver because Bella is _your_ nickname," he teased, but I saw the twinkle in his shining eyes. An unbidden thought entered my mind . I was starting to wonder how my world could get any better-or worse.

***

"Tomorrow?" I asked reluctantly. Edward nodded, and I resisted the urge to touch his face, even in the privacy of our own rooms. After a moment, I gave in, and lightly traced the contours of his well-defined cheekbones and jaw. He looked down at me, amused, and put his own hands to my face. He nearly always waited for me to initiate contact; it was easier on both of us, knowing that I wouldn't lose it again like I had that horrible day in the study, though it had been necessary for both of us to show the hidden parts of our souls, and now we were both better off for it.

My comfort around him was only growing, and though I would now change my outer clothes in the same room as him, and I was nearly glued to his side, we never moved past kissing, though we'd only done that a handful of rare times. It was just the way we were; I wasn't ready for more, and he wasn't planning on anything that would crush the once fragile seeds of trust planted between us.

"You'll like them. Emmett is a doctor, and his wife, Rosalie, has known Alice and I for a long time," he murmured, still rubbing his thumbs against my cheeks. A red blush-now my trademark reaction- rose in my skin.

"I thought that Emmett might be able to recommend something for your scars, to help them fade," he added. I only nodded, because he had mentioned this before. "But Rosalie..well, she is rather…aggressive, unless you know her. She has handled her difficult past in a different way than you."

I swallowed uneasily. If _Edward_ called her aggressive, when he was so accepting, that meant she was very, very much so. And I wondered how many more troubled people-like Rosalie and Jasper and myself- he could have possibly befriended.

Thinking of Jasper sent another chilled shiver down my spine. He terrified me. And if Rosalie was any worse, I wasn't sure I would be capable of handling more people stepping into my already polarized life.

* * *

**Notes: So Bella is defintely changing! Even though the revelations of the past few chapters have seemed big, they're nothing in comparison to what's the whole plot is centered around!**

**So how was it? You know I love your opinions! Keep up the reviewing! Who likes the horse being brought into the story?**

**R&R!**


	8. Rising Storm

******I do not own Twilight. I do own, however, a love of strawberry gum.**

**Chapter Eight**

The sky was a light, indefinable grey. It was too early for the sun to have yet risen, so only faint light lit the room. I tossed and turned, trying to find a suitably comfortable spot. It was useless. Without Edward by my side, I wasn't going to get another minute of sleep; he'd become almost like drug to me. I could hardly even sleep without him near. It was terrifying, how much I needed him now. He'd so easily become my support, a pillar of stability in a storm of uncertainly.

With a tired sigh, I readied myself for the day and wandered from the room to the study, hoping to find Edward there. As far as I knew, he should be finished preparing for Emmet's and Rosalie's arrival. To my disappointment, the room was empty.

I hesitated at the door, and then swiftly turned to the right. I was slowly memorizing the sprawling maze that was the Masen home. Entering the kitchen, I scanned the whole room, hoping to see Alice or Edward. As early risers, they both tended to raid the kitchen for a light breakfast long before anyone else was even awake.

I turned away, mentally racking my brains for a place that Edward could be. I was so engrossed in my thoughts that I didn't notice someone else turn the corner until I ran straight into them. I stumbled away and cried out in surprise, almost losing my balance entirely. The person I'd crashed into used the counter to steady himself. His eyes went wide when he saw my face.

"Lady Isabella, I'm so sorry, I did not see you there!" he prattled. His voice was tinged with an odd accent. His rotund frame shook a little, and I watched as his pudgy face revealed a hint of anxiousness

"I'm fine," I insisted, taking another step back. I now recognized him as the main chef for this house. His apron should have given him away at once.

I turned, having every intention of exiting the kitchen by way of the other door, but the cook stopped me in my tracks. "Are you looking for Lord Masen?" he called after me. I suddenly comprehended that though he was slightly intimidated by my presence, he was making an effort to communicate with me despite this. I knew that the whole household staff was mystified by me; I was reclusive and made only limited conversation. They simply didn't know what to make of me. Whether this man was talking to me because he was looking to gain my favor, or because he was inquisitive, I didn't know.

I was tempted to ignore him and scurry from the room like a frightened rabbit, but this rankled me more than usual, so I ceased my internal debate and turned. "Do you know where he is?" I asked, quiet as ever.

"Yes, Lady. He left to arrange the arrival of your guests," he informed me. "Lord Masen will not return for a while, I'm sure."

The man stopped talking for a minute, and looked down as if he was thinking hard about something. I was about to thank him and attempt to steal back to the study when the cook met my eyes again. I noticed that his seemed kindly and cheerful. "Would you like something to eat? You could stay here until your husband returns from his trip," he suggested. I look at him in surprise, and for the first time noticed a hopeful edge to his face. Odd. I wanted to refuse, but…

He seemed benevolent enough. Alice would tell me to just talk to him, like she would. She could befriend the devil himself if she tried. No one was able to resist her exuberant charm.

"I don't want to be any trouble-" I objected weakly.

"No, no trouble at all!" he protested, his face gaining a merry touch.

"If you're certain…"I trailed off. He beamed at me, "Of course I am!"

One thing I could say for certain was that he was very enthusiastic. A bright kind of liveliness emanated from him as he hummed around the kitchen, pulling things together and picking up various utensils. I watched in fascination; I'd never watched someone cook before, and it looked entertaining.

"What is your name?" I asked shyly from where I sat in the corner, out of his way. I felt that it was rude for him to call me 'Lady' and 'Isabella' when I didn't have even the slightest clue as to who _he_ was.

"I am," he announced with a flourish, a light dusting of flour coating his hands, "Gavino the cook."

Though I fought the urge, the corners of my mouth turned up and I giggled softly at his theatrics. I wondered how I hadn't run into him before. Immediately I wanted to smack myself for my own foolishness. I never saw Gavino because I never went into the kitchen-there was no reason to.

For a while longer I listened as Gavino cheerfully chattered away while munching on warm muffins he had made. Occasionally he would ask me something, and I would answer as best I could. It was mostly simple things he asked about, such as what I preferred to eat, and how well I was adjusting. It was pleasant, I acknowledged, to be treated so casually by someone.

When someone unexpectedly entered the kitchen and whispered into my ear from behind, I nearly leaped from the chair and yelped in surprise. "I see you're up earlier than usual," he remarked.

"Edward!" I exclaimed, my annoyance and relief at seeing him warring briefly for control. The eagerness won out, and forgetting we were not alone in the room, I flung my arms around him for a customary hug. I held tightly to him for a minute before stepping back, blushing, when I remembered Gavino's presence.

However, when I turned to look at him, he was softly singing a jolly tune while cutting something up by the sink, though his mouth was turned up in an unrepressed grin.

I smiled at Gavin as we exited the kitchen, and I could've sworn he winked at me, but we were walking too fast for me to be certain.

"It would appear that you had a good morning," Edward commented nonchalantly.

"Yes," I agreed easily. "But what about you?"

"Not as well as it could have been," he confessed, jaw clenched. When I looked to him for an explanation he only shrugged. This piqued my curiosity; what didn't he want to tell me? I wouldn't press him though. We both still had more than enough hidden from each other.

"My lord!" someone shouted from behind. Edward immediately spun around. A man was sprinting towards us, panting heavily.

"My lord," he gasped out. It was apparent by the poor man's heaving chest that he must have run a long way. "It's the king."

"What about the king?" Edward snapped, deep lines drawn in his furrowed brow. "He was attacked in a failed assassination attempt. He's calling the nobles together," the tired man informed him, straitening a little.

"To the palace?" he asked, face still drawn tight. "Or one of the castles?"

"The Ezran castle, my lord. You should be there in two weeks time." He looked from Edward to I, before Edward dismissed him with a wave. We resumed walking, though now we moved more slowly. Thick layers of tension hung in the air.

"It will only take a full day of travel to reach Ezra. We won't leave for at least a week, perhaps longer," he reasoned aloud. We had reached the side door to the house, one that was significantly less ornamented and carved than the front. Edward and I passed through while he continued his musings. Finally he paused for a moment.

"Bella, would you rather stay here? I know you're still adjusting, and-"

I cut him off, "No, I want to go with you." I put my hand on his arm. He nodded in acceptance, though his expression betrayed his worry. He saw more and more each day how little interaction I'd had with most of the world, from being penned up in my home for the entirety of my life.

"I will make the necessary arrangements then." He paused for a minute before continuing, "Are you ready for your lesson?" he asked teasingly. He knew how much I both dreaded and looked forward to these trips.

In response I just turned my back to him and entered the stables. His laughter rang out behind me. It didn't take long for him to catch up. We split up for a few minutes to get our own horses.

Edward saddled and bridled his own horse, Ianto, with ease. I had to wait sheepishly while a hostler handled Silver Bells for me.

When both were ready, the animals were lead outside. After the hostler departed, I took my time mounting Silver. She waited patiently beneath me, which I was grateful for.

I was relieved that there was no one to watch us-both because I was a terrible rider, despite my improvement, and the fact that I wasn't riding sidesaddle. It was the proper way to ride a horse for women, but rebellious Alice told me outright that she never rode that way, and she wasn't going to let Edward teach me how to. In the end I agreed, if only because it would appease her, and now I rode the way Edward did. Though it wasn't really appropriate I couldn't see the harm in it.

The hour passed by quickly, with us walking or trotting down trails to boost my confidence. Edward called out tips and advice as we went, ensuring that I knew what I was doing. His dark colored horse was gigantic, and I was amazed that he remained so in control with such ease. I figured he had a gift for horsemanship.

When the horses were back in their stalls, happily munching away at oats and hay, we returned to our room to clean up. According to Edward, our new guests had already arrived and were going to meet us in the front hall. I wanted to delay, to make the time before I met them stretch out as long as possible, but I didn't want to disappoint Edward. With little enthusiasm I finished getting ready and took Edward's hand-this gave me a powerful case of déjà vu. I could only hope that this time it ended better.

***

Sunlight drifted from the open windows in lazy spirals, brightening the front hall. I could hear faint conversation through the door, and my knees felt slightly weak. All I could think about was how this new arm to Edward's 'family' would accept me. I'd had mixed success with the last two.

The voices ceased when we came into view, Edward with one arm slung around me for comfort. He knew as well as I did that I was all too easily daunted by strangers.

The first thing I noticed was the man, Emmett. He was easily the largest man I'd seen in my life, and the instinctive urge to escape twisted uneasily at the back of my mind. He was also handsome, I saw at my second glance, in a rugged, tough kind of way.

I assumed Rosalie was the woman, and I couldn't even begin to describe my shock when I saw her. If the doctor was the most physically intimidating person I'd ever come across, then she was the most beautiful. Her blonde hair curled lightly around an unbelievably striking face. Her red mouth set into a hard, straight line when her eyes settled on me.

I flinched without meaning to, and though Emmett didn't notice, both Edward and Rosalie did. Edward's arm tightened around me. This did not escape Rosalie's notice; her face took on an edge of disgust.

I felt my weak display of confidence withering, but before I could say even a word, sudden booming laughter rang loudly through the hall. It startled me, and I quickly sought out the source. It was Emmett, who was now ambling over.

"Edward, it's good to see you!" he declared. His deep voice echoed as loudly as his initial greeting.

Edward shook his head in mock despair. "I'm afraid I can't say the same to you, with you being the pestilence you are. It doesn't help that you eat us out of house and home," he chuckled. I watched this exchange, observing how the light banter flowed easily between the two men. I felt a sour pang of jealousy that my own insecurities prevented me from interacting in the same manner.

"Ah, and this is the Lady Swan?" Emmett's attention now turned to me. His eyes roamed appraisingly over Edward's expression and the arm around me. "Well, I must say, Edward, you are lucky man."

I blushed, the color rising easily in my cheeks. Emmett laughed, amused. "I hope Edward has been treating you well. He never was one for marriage." He beckoned to his wife then, deaf to Edward's objections.

Rosalie, who had been standing to the side of the three of us, now stepped forward. The look in her eyes told me just how she thought of me. I didn't know what made her so averse to me, but it was mutual. I didn't like the way she glanced at me. I felt threatened by it.

I shrank the tiniest bit into Edward, his warm body giving me reassurance and strength. With him behind me, I was fine. It was uncanny how things had reversed between us. He was now my mainstay of stability rather than the one who made me vulnerable.

"This is Rosalie," Emmett introduced her, oblivious to the ice in her eyes. "Are Alice and Jasper here?" he asked. The sudden change in topic distracted me. I guess I hadn't expected him to be connected to the pair in the same way as Edward, even though I distinctly recalled him saying the five of them were very close. He'd also mentioned that they had grown apart somewhat after he remained alone whilst the others married.

Edward nodded, and Emmett, in a show of unrestrained enthusiasm, punched the air and whooped gleefully. I wanted to grin at his child-like antics, but I could still fell Rosalie's eyes on me, uncomfortably hostile.

"Where are they then? Surely they don't want to miss the homecoming of a brother?" he complained in mock sorrow.

"_Emmett! Rosalie!_ You're here!" I heard a now familiar voice nearly shouting at the top of her lungs. Even at that pitch, her voice still managed to come out bell-like and musical. She tackled Emmett, although they were polar opposite in size. Minutes later she was doing the same to Rosalie. I was expected her to refuse Alice's excitement, but to my surprise, her expression softened, a smile gracing her perfect lips.

Jasper wasn't far behind. He greeted Emmett, and the two of them launched themselves into a heated debate about the damage a dagger could do when used properly. I was puzzled until I realized that because Emmett was a doctor, and Jasper was educated in weaponry, that they both were probably well versed on the subject.

Alice was literally dancing around the rest of us, her dark eyes shining. "Oh, Bella, we'll have so much fun with Rosalie here!" she sang. I looked at Rosalie doubtfully, and I saw that her face had once again become unreadable. "Maybe," I shrugged, noncommittally. I didn't want to disappoint her.

The reunion lasted for quite a while. It was apparent that everyone had a lot to catch up on, having spent so long apart. I found out that Emmett and Rosalie had been on the move so that Emmett could study the medical practices of different people.

I considered attempting to slip away, but I didn't want to look rude and I knew it would be very obvious if I suddenly left. Finally we moved from the hall to the dining room for lunch. I picked at my meal while everyone continued to converse. I felt out of it, an outsider who didn't understand the mechanisms of a group event.

Edward noticed my discomfort. I was sure Alice had too, but she said nothing. Edward leaned towards me, and whispered, "After lunch Emmett and Rosalie will need to settle in. They're staying for a while, like Alice and Jasper. You and I will go and prepare for our trip. Sound good to you?" he asked, gauging my reaction. He was giving me the opportunity to recuperate. He had to have noticed the loathing way that Rosalie was ignoring me.

I nodded quickly, grateful for a reprieve. He smiled, and chills raced through my spine, prickling and leaving behind odd tingles. I flashed him an answering grin. He made me react in the most curious, sensational ways. I noticed that the table's talk had lessened, and nearly everyone was watching us. I flushed, thoroughly embarrassed and self-conscious. Emmett sniggered. His wife only watched in derision. Jasper's face was emotionless, and Alice was grinning. I was beginning to doubt her sanity.

Slowly everyone went back to their conversations, though the aura of edginess remained. When the dishes had been cleared, we split, just as Edward had promised.

Unfortunately, the drama wasn't over yet. Rosalie left Emmett on their way to the rooms they were to occupy and sought us out. Edward gestured for me to go ahead and enter the study and begin the preparations. I agreed; I didn't need to stay near Rosalie any longer.

However, as I tried shut the door behind me, it stuck and refused to fully close. Upon further investigation, I saw that it was jammed with a bit of the carpeting. I left it as it was, not wanting to damage the rug.

I was sorting through paperwork on the desk, seeking out a map, when I realized that I could hear Edward and Rosalie in the hall. Their voices were growing louder, and I was positive that neither knew that I could hear.

I tried to ignore them, but it was useless. I could hear every word whether I wanted to or not. Suddenly, I heard my name, and I froze, listening.

"-know that! You see how she follows you, like your shadow! I can't believe that you're falling for-"

"Enough!" Edward warned, voice flat with pent up fury. "You don't have any idea what you are talking about. If you want to compare her to yourself, go ahead. That doesn't mean a thing to me; I _know _you are wrong," he hissed.

"I'm doing this for you!" she cried. "No, Rosalie, you're not. I know what this is about, and it needs to stop. If Emmett knew…" The hall abruptly slid into silence. There was a sharp intake of breath, then, "You wouldn't."

"I would." Came Edward's reply, hard and unyielding. Finally, there was the sound of footsteps, and a sigh from outside the door.

Edward came into the study a minute later. There was a forced smile on his face that was painfully artificial. "I had to take care of a little business," he told me. I just nodded. He was obviously very upset, so I let him be.

***

Later that night, while we were in bed with only the light of the moon to see by, I considered asking Edward about his argument in the hall. I didn't want him to know that I had been eavesdropping, however unintentional it had been, though so I decided against it. Instead, I asked something else that had aroused my interest.

"Why did Rosalie marry Emmett? She's a noble, and he's only a doctor," I said softly. Sometimes, at night, it just felt right to be quieter, even if there was no reasoning behind that. "And she doesn't seem like the type to do that," I added.

I felt Edward chuckle beneath me. "True. I think she did it for love. I see nothing else that ever could have swayed her from her the man she was supposed to have married. I stifled a gasp. "She was promised to someone else?" I queried, not wanting to make assumptions.

"Yes. It was kind a scandal at the time." We laid there quietly for a while, each absorbed in our own thoughts. I wondered what it was like to love someone like that. I quickly shoved the thought away. I was married….to Edward. Why did that no longer make me weep? Why did thinking about him send trembles through my body?

I banished that thought away. I was nearly on top of him, and I didn't need to think about such thing while in this position but-

My thought processes stopped when Edward kissed the top of my head, and his hand began to rub soothing circles on my back. I sighed in pleasure, enjoying the sensation. How had I gotten here?

***

A few days later, a confrontation had yet to occur, but everyone could feel it approaching. The uncomplicated companionship that had been apparent at first was slowly being overshadowed. The tense atmosphere seemed to be primarily fueled and goaded on by Rosalie's hostility, my isolation, and Edward's stiff refusal to deal with either.

We were ready for the trip, with bags packed and letters sent. It turned out that Jasper would be going with us, while Emmett and Rosalie would remain in charge at our home in our absence. Alice proclaimed rather loudly that she was going to buy a whole new wardrobe for me while we were gone so that I would have something pleasant to return to. I knew I needed the clothes, because I had brought little with me from my old home, but I still dreaded it anyway.

I was saddened that Edward and I would no longer have as much privacy, because we would no longer be in our own home for a while, but I was also excited. I felt as though this trip was going to be the turning point of something; of what, however, I wasn't sure.

Of course, I never knew that in the aftermath, I was going to regret that.

* * *

**Notes: The secerets continue! I'm trying to build up the suspense here... Gavino was an unexpected addition, and Rosalie's behavior isn't normal either. Can anyone guess why?**

**Thanks to everyone who's reviewed so far, and I hope you all had happy holidays and new year!**

**I'm glad I finally posted that promised long chapter. This is the longest one I've put up so far! I need everyone's opinion though-should I post more often , with shorter chapters, or fewer chapters that are longer? I can do either. **

**As always, feel free to point out errors or ask questions, and please review!**


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